Customer Service Superstars: Bagels

A  few weeks ago, the Nevada Interpreters and Translators Association held one of its many workshops. Just like every time, we pre-ordered some bagels and coffee from Einstein Bros. Bagels. Now, we've ordered from Einsteins for many years -- both for professional and personal events. We already know that the nice folks at Einsteins aren't always the best at getting our orders right, but their ability to make things right is remarkable. Let us elaborate on how sometimes one can retain customers by fixing problems.

Last month, Judy and the guest speaker picked up the bagels and the coffee and headed to the event across town. Upon getting there, they realized that Einsteins had neglected to include the cream cheese, stranding us with less-than-attractive dry bagels and no time to go buy anything else. Judy called Einsteins to complain (just out of principle), and to her surprise, the store manager offered to call another nearby store to have them deliver the cream cheese to us. In addition, the manager said she'd throw in a second dozen bagels for free.  Judy was very pleasantly surprised, and sure enough, in 30 minutes, a smiling and apologetic Einsteins employee had no trouble at all locating the (rather hard to find) downtown location and delivered everything to our hungry group of lingusts. 

Now, the fact that they didn't include the cream cheese the first time around is less than ideal. However, they took ownership of the problem and solved it quickly and very professionally. And they also went above and beyond by giving us extra bagels. Plus, their product itself is really, really good.

Of course this little anecdote isn't about bagels, but about customer service. Have you either experienced a similar situation as a client? Or have you, as a vendor, made a mistake but fixed it quickly and well? We certainly have made mistakes in the past, but have retained those clients because we went out of our way to acknowledge the problem. We then apologized, fixed the problem quickly, sent a little gift or gave a discount, and moved on. Please do tell us about your experiences by leaving a comment.

Cringe-Inducing Video: The Importance of Professional Interpreters

Happy Black Friday to our friends and colleagues in the US and happy Friday to everyone else! While we are certainly not going shopping, we are taking the day to play catch-up with work before we take the rest of the weekend off. Today we wanted to share this cringe-inducing article and video with you. They really drive home the point that professional interpreters are essential in many, many situations, especially during press conferences and public events. We recently came across the post on a Turkish blog (Turkish Business Translations), and while the video is in Turkish and in Italian, you don't need to speak either language to get the idea (we don't speak the languages, either). Here's the link to the blog and the video. We are also putting the YouTube video directly into this blog post, but be sure to read the accompanying article (aptly titled "Why you need a qualified and professional interpreter") so it really makes sense. 

What do you think, dear colleagues? While we do feel bad for the poor pseudo-interpreters, they should probably know their limitations, and this is what happens when you don't. We'd love to hear your thoughts.

Monday Humor: German-Language Video

Thanks to our colleagues from the German Language Division of the American Translators Association, who found this gem and recently posted it on the listserv. It's quite silly and a bit absurd, but it's also pretty hilarious, and makes a (funny, if slightly long-winded) point about German compound nouns. It's definitely intended for German speakers, but might be good entertainment even for those who don't speak the language. Enjoy!

Recommended Reading: White House Interpreter

Last week at the fantastic 54th Annual Conference of the American Translators Association, we were lucky enough to get an autographed copy of The White House Interpreter by legendary English->German diplomatic Harry Obst. In addition, we also had the chance to hear him give a very entertaining (and packed!) lecture. Mr. Obst is now in his 80s, and hearing him speak about his experiences interpreting at the highest levels of diplomatic relations for seven American presidents was a truly unique experience.

Our autographed copy. 

As soon as we got home to Vegas (before Dagy flew back to Austria), Judy started reading the book and devoured it. It's an easy, non-academic read about Mr. Obst's long career and his interaction with presidents, secretaries of state, annoying bureaucrats, mid-level diplomats, and everyone in between. In the early parts of the book, the author makes some excellent points about the lack of formal college education for interpreters, which has resulted in, well, the lack of well-trained interpreters in America. He's got a point, but he makes it so often and so passionately that it's clear he has a bone to pick with an academic institution somewhere, although he wisely does not name any names.

At his career level, it's obvious that the author doesn't have to hold back, and his opinions on everything from certain colleagues (not named) to certain presidents (clearly named) are quite clear. It's rather refreshing to read a book by someone who doesn't have to walk on eggshells when it comes to certain topics, and Mr. Obst not only provided a fascinating insight into an interpreting world into which most interpreters never have access, but he also pulled back the curtain on politics and negotiating at the highest levels. You guessed it: presidents can be as petty as the rest of us, but some are very gracious and respectful, while others are not. Mr. Obst extensively writes about the obstacles that interpreters face on the job, and most of us who work in other fields (court, medical, etc.) will certainly be able to relate. In person, Mr. Obst still has a hint of the charming German accent that reminds us that he risked his life to flee former East Germany to come to the United States, a country that he served well for many decades. He's an effortless and witty writer who really makes his anecdotes come alive. At times, we could almost feel those leather seats on Air Force One as he crossed the Atlantic for the 52nd time in 1979!

Mr. Obst spends some time explaining his craft, and we wish he'd spent more time on what he considers (rightfully so) the key component to top-notch consecutive interpreting: proper note-taking technique. It's much feared by simultaneous interpreters around the world, who'd rather have a root canal than do consecutive, but it's still the holy grail of interpreting and the key mode for diplomatic interpreting. Mr. Obst shares one page of his notes and the corresponding paragraph those notes were based on, but he could have developed that portion of the book much better. In fact, we would have enjoyed an entire chapter on this subject. We'd read many an academic book on note-taking, but we bet Mr. Obst can teach us (and everyone else) many, many things on this important subject.

We truly enjoyed this peek at the high-paced, exciting, and highly stressful world of diplomatic interpreting, and the book was a great read. However, we were somewhat taken aback by Obst's consistent use of the male pronoun when referring to interpreters (example: "the interpreters trains his memory..."). He does add a note about this delicate issue ("with apologies to the female interpreters"). However, considering the fact that the vast majority of interpreters are female, it would have made more sense to use the female pronoun. And while the use of he/she isn't perhaps the most visually appealing option, we think it's important to include women in language.

Finally, let us leave you with some memorable quotes from this fantastic book, which is available at InTrans Book Service.

"Good interpreting schools teach their students how to analyze well by using a multitude of available tools and clues, just as good law schools and engineering schools do. One of those tools is good general knowledge of many fields. Where better to acquire such knowledge than at a university where a wide range of different subjects is taught in one place?" (page 37)

"The translator's product is for the ages, the interpreter's for the moment." (page 35)

"...the vast majority of American interpreters are not trained professionals. As a result, the reader, in many American environments, is more likely to encounter an untrained interpreter rather than a trainer professional. Encountering an untrained interpreter in Finland, France of Germany is a rare occurrence."  (page 39)

Read This: Slaves Of the Internet, Unite!

For the record: We paid for this image. 

This past Sunday, we did what we always do on Sundays: We read the print edition of the paper of record, The New York Times. Yes, we are old school like that and really like getting ink on our paper. And the paper smells great, too, but we digress.

One article on the cover page of the Sunday Review caught our attention, and we wanted to share it with all of you, dear readers. Today is Halloween, so we will tackle the spooky subject of not getting paid for your work. Turns out writer Tim Kreider also has a few things to say about the subject, and as a writer for the NYT, he writes infinitely more eloquently than we do. The bottom line is: giving away your work for free stinks. And it means others don't value it. If they did value it, they would pay you for it. So don't give it away for free. This article as been quite popular, and to date, there are more than 650 comments on the online version. 

Here's the link to the brilliant article (we recommend you subscribe to the NYT, but we believe the first few articles a month are free). The author concludes his article with a smart piece of advice that he's willing to share with everyone. Actually, it's a nifty e-mail template that you can use to respond to people who want your work for free. Since the author intended this to be freely shared, we are copying it here:

Here, for public use, is my very own template for a response to people who offer to let me write something for them for nothing:

Thanks very much for your compliments on my [writing/illustration/whatever thing you do]. I’m flattered by your invitation to [do whatever it is they want you to do for nothing]. But [thing you do] is work, it takes time, it’s how I make my living, and in this economy I can’t afford to do it for free. I’m sorry to decline, but thanks again, sincerely, for your kind words about my work.

It's nice to see that translators aren't the only ones who get asked to do free work. We knew it's quite common with writers and illustrators as well, and it's great to read such on on-point essay about this important topic. What do you think, dear readers? How do you handle these tricky situations? We'd love to hear from you. 

The Translation Tribe

We've both been on the road quite a bit lately -- actually, we have been traveling to workshops and conferences in Europe together, which has been truly fantastic. During our workshops (we do some jointly, and many individually) we like to emphasize how important it is to have great working relationships with your colleagues. These professionals are your friends, your support team, your cheerleading team (if you need them), your linguistic consulting group (think listservs and industry boards), problem-solvers and very oftentimes your friends. Colleagues and friends help you out when you get sick and cannot complete a translation, serve as contractors if you need them, refer work to you, recommend you, help you, etc. We have always invested time into building our relationships with fantastic friends and colleagues around the world, and for the first time during a workshop in London, Judy came up with a catchy term: the translation tribe.

Part of the translation tribe at the Proz conference in Recife, Brazil.

Unfortunately, many times we see some unnecessary fighting and needless disagreements between members of our tribe, be it in person or online. It's certainly true that it's impossible to get along well with everyone, and that there will always be people with whom you cannot agree, and it's fine to disagree. However, rather than weakening each other's position, we think it's crucial to strengthen and build each other up by the power of this international translation tribe. 

So let's make a commitment to each other and to ourselves to treat our translation tribe with all the respect, professionalism and yes, love, it deserves -- even when we disagree. We are not saying, by any stretch of the imagination, that our industry doesn't get along, but we have noticed occasional negative interactions and tones, especially in the online space. However, we think it's important for all of us to have a positive, welcoming place (well, a virtual place) to go to with problems, challenges, and concerns: we should be able to turn to our translation tribe for help and support. 

We think about this quite frequently: that we would never have made it thus far in our careers without the love and support of mentors, more experienced translators, associations, volunteers, and endless hours of advice and support from our friends. We are extraordinarily grateful to be part of this great translation tribe, which is composed of thousands of individuals. Let's all take a moment and thank each other at some point for how far we've come as an industry. We still have a long way to go, but there's no doubt that we are stronger together. No translator is an island, and you truly cannot do it alone. And you don't have to: you've got your translation tribe!

What about you, dear readers? Do you feel like you are part of the translation tribe?

Humor: Seductive Tasty Pleasure in Santorini

Not great.

Today's post is just for fun, because life is short and it's good to laugh, even if the translations/slogans are scary. The picture on the left is a photo of a flyer that we received from a restaurant in Santorini, Greece. In spite of the fact that this restaurant is abusing the English language a bit, we ate there anyway, and we are happy to report that there's nothing fishy about this restaurant.

But the place is great indeed.

By reading the ad, one might think this place is adults-only, but no: it's a lovely , family-friendly place by the beach. We spent a fantastic afternoon there and had some tasty fish, appetizers, gyros, light white wine, and went swimming in the crystal-clear waters of the Mediterranean. Our day in Santorini was one of the many highlights of our recent Greek vacation, for which we are incredibly grateful. And we also collected lots of fun examples of Greeklish! OK, we just made that up. It is hard to tell if these masterpieces are translations from Greek or German or just simply poor writing by folks who probably shouldn't be doing any writing in English (especially not if 'it's printed by the thousands). We bet it's the latter, but we will never know. 

Sometimes you just have to take it all with a grain of salt, forget about language, and focus on enjoying an epic meal. And we are here to tell you that the talented folks at Atmosphere do know how to cook!

Happy Wednesday!

Friday Challenge: Advertising Translations

As seen at the Athens airport.

This past week, we spent a glorious week in Greece with Judy's hubby and our dear translator friends Catherine Christaki and Christos Floros (more on that fantastic vacation in a future post) and we saw a lot of clumsy attempts at English -- think menus, flyers, ads, etc. 

We oftentimes ask Keith, our resident native English speaker (and a funny, sarcastic attorney with a very dry sense of humor) what he thinks about the ads that have been translated, mostly very poorly. It's interesting to hear his perspective. As a non-translator, he isn't immediately put off by bad language. Rather, he either just doesn't get the ad, ignores it, moves on, or decides he doesn't want the product (this recently happened with an Austrian Airlines ad, which had Keith shaking his head in disbelief). He doesn't speak another language, so he can't really deduce the message's meaning based on the source text. It's fascinating to pick his brain about language and its impact. In general, he thinks about language significantly less than we do, which isn't surprising.

When we showed him the ad that we've included above, he said he certainly understood what was being said, but that he also thought it was funny because it's missing a noun. Translating any sort of advertising is a very challenging undertaking, and we have many fantastic colleagues who tackle who are really good at it. We don't know if this is a translation or a clever (or not clever?) language experiment, but German company Jacobs is using the slogan "Experience the perfect." It's not terrible (and it's certainly different and attention-catching, which is the point of advertising) and one could  construe it as a clever attempt at molding and shaping the language into something new (after all, language changes and evolves). And of course, advertising language has been pushing the envelope for decades. Alternatively, it may just be a bad translation. Your opinion might depend on your perspective and perhaps on the languages you speak and your tolerance for new advertising speak. Another question is this: is the world ready for the nounification of adjectives? Perhaps? Are we ready for "the perfect"?

What about you, dear colleagues? What do you think? Would you have come up with something entirely different or stuck with the straight-up translation? We could not verify this on the Jacbos website, but perhaps the original German was "Erleben Sie Perfektion."Do you think the existing translation (assuming that it is) is mortifying or is it good enough? Does it communicate the message, which is the point of translation? Or do you think this was created from scratch in English and is meant to push the language envelope? OK, those are too many questions for a Friday afternoon (in Europe), but it's food for thought. We'd love to hear your opinions on this.  We find this topic very interesting, and we hope you do, too.

Video of the Week: Are Translators a Waste of Space?

Many thanks to the Norwegian Association of Literary Translators for creating this gem. It's only a few minutes long, and it's not what you think it is. Watch one of the most clever videos we have seen all year! In case you want to share it, here's the direct link to the YouTube video.

How Not to Treat Your Customers

We really enjoy learning from other businesses -- or learning what not to do . We think it's important to occasionally look outside our own profession for customer service inspiration or marketing ideas, and once in a while, we get treated the way we wouldn't want to get treated, and we make a mental note. Here's a recent conversation (slightly changed to protect the innocent) that Judy had with a pest control company. It reminded us how important it is to explain one's product or service to the potential customer without sounding condescending.

Pest control place: (mumbling) Pest control.

Judy: Um, hello, is this XYZ pest control on Bugkiller Avenue?

Pest control place: Yes.

Judy (thinking: "I don't feel very welcome here"): Well, um, I have ants everywhere, can you come out and give me an estimate? How much would it cost to get rid of them? I feel bad for killing them, but I don't want them in my cereal....

Pest control place (cutting Judy off): We don't need to come out to give you an estimate. We can just tell you over the phone.

Judy (annoyed): Well, OK, do tell me, then.

Pest control place: I need more information.

Judy (annoyed): OK, what do you need to know?

Pest control place (annoyed): Well, you know, the basics.

Judy (annoyed): Basics? I don't know anything about your business, so I don't know what the basics are. You haven't told me how you charge, so I don't know which information you need from me. Just ask and I will tell you.

Pest control place (annoyed): Well, my dear, it's by square footage, so I need the square footage of your house.

Judy: OK, why didn't you tell me that sooner? It's 1,800 square foot with a big yard. I also have a 100-pound Labranard, her name is Luna, and she doesn't like the ants, either, but I am not sure that matters.

Pest control place: That would be $150.

Judy: $150 for what?

Pest control place: To spray for ants. Or did you say you had cockroaches?

Judy: I get that, but how many times? How long will it take? What kind of products do you use? Is it safe for my dog? Do I have to leave the house? You seem very reluctant to give me information here, and I don't understand that. I am trying to give you business here. Where do you spray the chemicals? On the wall?

Pest control place: Why would we spray the chemical on the wall?

Judy (exasperated): I have no idea where you spray it -- I am not in the pest control business. I am merely asking questions, but you are not answering them.

Pest control place: I am sorry, I am just not feeling very good today. I apologize if I've been grouchy.

Judy: I hope you feel better, but I really don't think this is going to work out. I feel like I've inconvenienced you terribly with this phone call, so I don't want to inconvenience you any further by giving you my business.

Pest control place: I am so sorry! Look, we use an all-natural spray that's safe for pets and children. You don't have to leave the house at all. It will take about 20 minutes and we spray the baseboards in the house and also in the backyard.

Judy: I appreciate that, but I don't think your company is a good fit for me.

Pest control place: Please give us another chance!

Judy: I will think about it. Have a lovely day!

We think it's a powerful lesson to remind ourselves that our customers -- the direct clients purchasing translation and interpreting services -- most likely don't know anything about translation and interpretation. That's where we come in. It's our job to explain to them what a source word is, why we bill by the word, etc. It doesn't make them uneducated not to know these details; rather, it's simply not their area of expertise, and as providers, we need to clearly explain the process to them. This is something linguists oftentimes forget, but instead of complaining about clients who are unfamiliar with our processes, we should see the situation as an opportunity for client education. 

We would love to hear your thoughts on this!

Friday Humor

Happy Friday, dear readers! Today's post is short and sweet. This is an ad that Judy picked up at a restaurant in Recife, Brazil, during her stay in the gorgeous country for the fantastic Proz.com conference. 

Very, very close. 

The ad is largely in Portuguese, with one memorable line in English. We hear from our Brazilian friends that advertisers like to use English phrases and words, such as a pizzeria that calls itself "steakhouse" in English, even though it is clearly a pizzeria. English is considered quite cool, which is fantastic, but as we can see, the results are not always great. Perhaps advertisers should rely on some of the fantastic English/Portuguese translators Judy met at the conference. 

Surely Walber Marinho is a fabulous hairdresser, and he also uses that English-language term in his ad, but now he should rely on other professionals for his language needs. It really is amazing that one small letter (missing, in this case) makes all the difference.

To see a larger version, simply click on the image. 

With that: have a great weekend. 

Decision Tree: Bad Translations

Palm trees near Recife, Brazil. Pic by Judy.

One of the complaints/questions we get from colleagues quite frequently goes something like this: "My client has some terrible translations on their website. I keep on telling them the translation is awful, but my client doesn't think so and refuses to do anything. What should I do?"

This is a common situation, and not one that lends itself to easy answers. We thus tried to come up with some sort of decision tree. Judy tried to use SimpleDiagram to make a tree,  but her computer-based drawing skills are just as bad as her handwriting, so we abandoned this project and will just put this in writing. We've included a picture of palm trees, as they are also trees!

Ask yourself the following questions:

• Does this affect the quality of your work or your reputation? That is, do you need these translations for your own translations (=are they reference material)? Do these translations make you look bad? Our bet is that since you didn't translate them, your name isn't on them, so we don't see how they could really directly make you look bad. We translate plenty of websites, and know that clients oftentimes tinker with them without our knowledge and do the occasional translation themselves. It's not ideal, but it's the nature of the web. Also think about this: if you, for instance, translate the company's contracts, and they happen to have a terrible website, that's certainly very unfortunate, but has no ill effect on your work other than that it annoys you. You've done your due diligence by pointing out this shortcoming to your client, and that's all you can do. Move on.
• Is the client paying you? We had colleagues talk to us who are so ticked off at their client's language nonchalance that they are tempted to end the working relationship. Needless to say, we think that's a poor decision. We are not the language police nor can we make clients do what we think is best. All we can do is make recommendations and suggestions, and if they don't accept them, well, then we have to accept the fact that our word isn't gospel. As long as the client is paying you for whatever translation work you are performing for them and you enjoy that relationship, there's no reason to be a purist and let your convictions get in the way of making a living. For instance, our dentists constantly point out that we don't floss enough. It's the same story every six months, but they continue to provide dental services. Perhaps this isn't the best analogy we have ever come up with, but it will do for now.
• Does this annoy you so much you just cannot handle it? Well, if it does, then you are certainly as free as the other party to walk away from this relationship, and you have every right to to so. You are not married to your client, and if seeing your client's bad translations gives you heartburn and increases your blood pressure to dangerous levels, then sever the relationship. Just ask yourself: is it really worth it? We do have one client who pays us very well for the work we do for him but insists on doing other portions of his business translations himself. We cringe when we see them, and have gently pointed out that it would be best to have "one voice" for his translations (a euphemism for "your translations are not up to par"), but he thinks things are fine the way they are. We tried. So we continue working, cash his checks, and have hope that he will come around.

Of course, please take this all with a small grain of salt, but in essence, this is what we would recommend. We would very much enjoy reading your comments and thoughts on this topic. Happy Wednesday!

Warriors Needed

Unfortunately, the public in general doesn't tend to know too terribly much about what we do, and many might think that anyone who is bilingual can be a translator, but that's like saying that anyone who can listen and speak is automatically a therapist or anyone who speaks English is a reporter or anyone who is funny is a comedian -- the list goes on on and on. Of course, being perfectly bilingual is the minimum requirement one needs to meet to be a professional translator, but we digress.

That's Tree pose, and not Warrior, but close enough?

We have a confession to make: when it comes to the public's lack of awareness about our profession, we have a particular pet peeve. For one reason or another, we cringe when we hear "Hillary Clinton is speaking through a translator," although this clearly is about an interpreter. The confusion doesn't seem to happen the other way around, but interpreters are consistently called translators. This might not be a big deal, but they are different professions, and we figured it's important to clear up this incorrect use of terms in the media. So instead of complaining to our colleagues and to each other, we decided to complain effectively and tell the media outlets in question that get it wrong. We write regular e-mails to a large number of newspapers, radio programs and magazines, and being a squeaky wheel has even gotten Judy on NPR, which issued a correction. The nice side effect of this is that NPR has now called her several times for a comment on a language-related issues. It sure looks like being a squeaky wheel might pay off.

So we have a proposal to make: join us. Instead of complaining to each other on Twitter (or elsewhere), tell the people who make the mistake and clear up the misunderstanding. This could be a simple two-line e-mail, which can be saved for future use (that's what we do). We frequently like to point out that translation (written word) and interpreting (spoken word) are like libel (written) and slander (spoken). Keep the tone nice and friendly and offer to elaborate. 

Can you imagine if even 1,000 colleagues sent one e-mail a day to some media outlet? We'd get more coverage for our profession, which is always a good thing, and we might educate the media and the public while we are at it, which is fantastic. We like to think about this translation/interpreting confusion along the lines of: what if the media consistently confused psychiatrists with psychologists? We bet the American Medical Association (and other associations around the world) would be up in arms about this. When translation and interpreting get confused, we figured that in addition to our professional associations setting the record straight, it can't hurt if we do it on an individual level as well.

And you know how our profession might get more recognition, the recognition it deserves? Perhaps by being talked about in the media. So let's combine the power of the media and the power of freelance translators around the world.

Will you join us and be a translation and interpreting warrior?

Mortifying: Mistake of the Week

Perhaps Judy needs new glasses. 

Just like every other business professional, we occasionally make mistakes. We don't make too many mistakes, otherwise we wouldn't be in business, but every once in a while, we make a mistake that's so mortifying that we can't help but share it with all of you -- for both entertainment and learning purposes. Read on for the most recent error (all identifying details have been changed).

A week or so ago, Judy was working on preparing two quotes for personal document translations for two different clients. One was a divorce decree and one was a university diploma. To save some time, Judy used one quote that she generated using TranslationOffice 3000 and simply replaced the key terms (bad idea!), including the client's name. Judy quickly sent off both quotes and waited for the customers to respond. One of them did respond very quickly, and he wasn't happy (understandably so).

The customer, who is completely lovely, said, basically, that he didn't really speak any Spanish, but that he was quite certain the document he needed translated for his client (he was a lawyer) was a university degree and not a divorce decree, as his client was happily married. You guessed it -- Judy did not replace that essential term when she sent the quote. We usually have a section that defines the project to be undertaken, and on this potential client's quote, it read: "Translation of a three-page divorce decree from Spanish into German." Well, this customer had submitted a one-page university diploma to us. Needless to say, we were mortified and apologized to the client. Judy sent this to Dagy: "Completely my fault. I am fully responsible for this error -- no excuses. We really don't deserve to get this project." 

We told the customer that we certainly didn't think that we deserved his business, but turns out he told us that he appreciated our obvious remorse and contracted with us for this small project anyway. We are extremely grateful to have understanding customers.

What about you, dear colleagues? Have you made a mistake that you would be willing to share? Please do so by leaving a comment. 

Free SDL Webinar: May 9

Happy Friday, dear readers! We wanted to let you know about a free webinar that Judy will be presenting next week, courtesy of software giant SDL. There is no catch and nothing to buy -- simply sign up and attend. The topic will be "5 habits of highly successful translators: Customer service edition."

The webinar will begin at 5 p.m. BST, London time (GMT +1 hour) and will last an hour. That's 9 a.m. Pacific and 12 p.m. Eastern here in the U.S. The presentation will last roughly 45 minutes and Judy will take questions at the end. We will be using WebEx technology for this -- very easy and user-friendly, so if this is your first webinar, you will find it very simply to use. 

Please use this link to register and feel free to tell your friends!

Here is a short summary of the webinar's content:

Running a successful freelance translation business requires many skills, but we also must have good habits, especially when it comes to interacting with our customers and making them happy. After all, without clients, we don’t have a business. This webinar will be presented by Judy Jenner and will focus on 5 habits of highly successful translators and will specifically address customer interaction skills and habits.  You will learn:

• That it’s fine to work in your Snoopy pajamas as long as your online presence, communication and interaction are professional
• Why an e-mail message with a price does not constitute a price quote
• Why you should honor odd-sounding customer requests

A Day in the Life of a Busy Translator/Interpreter

We frequently receive questions about how we organize our days and how exactly we get everything done. The truth is that we don't always accomplish what we set out to do, but we give it the good old college try. We have one very serious rule that we always abide by: we never miss a deadline, ever. Anything else that doesn't have a deadline is less important, and as you will see, some things simply don't get done. Judy will start our two-part series with an overview of her day. Dagy's will follow.

Here is my day on a random weekday in April:

7 a.m. I am trying to follow in my twin's footsteps and get up earlier to get more done, but I am definitely not an early morning person, as opposed to my hubby, who is bouncing off the wall, taking our dog Luna for a walk, and paying bills starting at 5:30. This is also his favorite time to talk to me, as I am most likely to agree to anything. This is how we ended up with a current major backyard remodel. I grab a quick bowl of cereal with him, pet Luna, and send hubby off to the office to play nicely with the other attorneys, which he usually does.

7:30 a.m. I am at the computer, sorting through the 100+ e-mails that came in during the night. I already responded to the most important ones from my Android while still in bed, so I now decide what's important and what has to be taken care of immediately. I answer some requests for price quotes, correspond with existing clients about projects, and receive a new project from one of my favorite clients, which I outsource to my superstar English->Spanish translator, Dolores Rojo Guiñazú, who's also a dear friend of ours. I negotiate a good deadline so she has plenty of time, and she responds within five minutes that she can take the project. I am completely buried in work, so everything that comes in this week will be outsourced to our superstar contractors.

Yes, I am wearing Snoopy pajamas.

8:30 a.m. I get a friendly reminder from my twin, Dagy, that I still have not proofed and edited her existing translation from a long-time client that she sent yesterday. I do this right away -- it's an interesting business correspondence between two parties who don't speak the same language. Her translation is very strong, but I still have some comments and corrections. We are very happy with the end result. Dagy integrates my changes, we discuss a few more details via instant message, and she delivers the project to the client. He responds saying that in his next life he would like to have our language and writing skills. This very sweet comment made my day. I read the American and Mexican news online, but don't have time to read the Austrian press. I listen to National Public Radio in the background, and they are doing a fundraiser that just started today. I grab my wallet and donate.

9 a.m. I jump in the shower to get ready for my 11 a.m. interpreting assignment at a deposition for a civil litigation matter. I'm not having a great hair day, so I throw my hair in a ponytail and put on a black suit. I continue working and answer 23 e-mails. I grade some assignments submitted by my students in the Intro to Interpreting class at UC San Diego-Extension (online) and review the grade I received a few days ago myself when I took a mock exam for the federal interpreting certification exam (I passed the mock). I receive a large project from an existing client. She's pre-paid all her translation work for the year (amazing), so I move her project to the top of the projects list. This is a project I must do myself, busy or not.

10 a.m. I turn in a short personal document translation that Dagy had proofed for me overnight.
It was due at

My officemate. 

5 p.m., but I turn in in at 10 a.m. and include the invoice in the same e-mail. The client is delighted, says everything looks good and provides payment within.... 5 minutes via PayPal. I am floored. I turn in one more short copywriting project that's due later today and get a response from my editor that she loves the article, but that I did not include one of the sources. I apologize, look up the source, and add that to the online system so the article is now complete. I issue two more invoices (using Translation Office 3000) before I have to leave the house. I pack my yoga bag because there's some hope I will work out on the way back from my interpreting assignment.

10:20 a.m. I jump in my Prius and drive the 15 miles to my interpreting assignment. I arrive significantly earlier than 11 a.m., which is one of my good/bad habits. I have 15 minutes, so I answer some more e-mails on my Android. I receive a phone call from a potential client who has an urgent request, who then calls back within a few minutes saying he doesn't need the project after all.

Let the interpreting begin.

11 a.m. As a certified Spanish court interpreter in Nevada, I have the necessary certification to interpret at this deposition, and it's pretty routine. I chat with the court reporter and try not to speak with the deponent without her attorney present, which can come across as rude. However, my code of ethics is pretty strict on this, so I make a quick (unnecessary) trip to the bathroom to avoid any chit-chat. The deposition is going smoothly until the defense and the plaintiff's counsel disagree over a technicality, so angry comments are flying back and forth, which I dutifully interpret for the deponent. She's confused and asks if she should respond to comments along the lines of: "Let the record reflect that counsel is being completely unreasonable." I interpret her question, and her lawyer says no, she only has to answer questions directed at her. The final 30 minutes go well, even though the deponent is speaking so loudly that occasionally the poor court reporter has trouble hearing me, as I am doing simultaneous interpretation, albeit without any equipment.

12:40 p.m. I break my own cardinal rule and eat a banana and a granola bar in my pristine car before rushing across town to make it to Bikram yoga (yoga practiced in a very hot room). I am a terrible yogini, but I certainly try. Everyone in the room is at least twice as flexible as I am. The instructor asks me to set an intention for the class, and I settle on survival.

2:10 p.m. I reward myself with a kale, mango, grape and lime smoothie called Brontosaurus. I am so sweaty that I have to change into another outfit before driving home.

It's really tasty and healthy.

2:30 p.m. Jump in the shower and get dressed again. Hair looks better now that it's been washed.

3 p.m. I have an hour to catch up on the new projects that have come in. I turn down an interpreting assignment for tomorrow, as I am completely booked. I follow-up on a price quote that I'd sent to a customer who has not responded. I get an e-mail from the American Translators Association asking me to do another webinar, but I have no bandwidth in the next few months, so I politely decline. I moderate some comments on this blog, check book sales (of our book, The Entrepreneurial Linguist) and correspond with a client who wants to publish some of my articles. We negotiate a fee and sign an agreement. I answer a few tweets and have a quick look at what's happened in the world.

4 p.m. I realize that I haven't done a very good job at planning today's schedule, as I have to leave the house after only one hour of working to make it to a downtown networking event and lecture. I am very involved in the revitalization of downtown Vegas, and on Fridays, I work from a cool new co-working space called Work in Progress. The so-called Downtown Project is pouring hundreds of millions of dollars into downtown, and I love what's happening -- I am a self-appointed downtown cheerleader. These efforts are led by Zappos CEO and entrepreneur extraordinaire, Tony Hsieh, whom I run into at the networking event that features free organic fruit. We play the usual game of him trying to guess my name (he's close), as he's terrible with names. Oddly enough, he might actually remember my name because I constantly tease him that he doesn't. I also run into an old friend from a previous job whom I hadn't seen in ages. It was great to see her and we make plans for lunch. Networking objective accomplished. There are roughly 200 people at this event, and I talked to quite a few of them. I feel that I've gotten a bit complacent in my networking, and I vowed to change that. I am proud of self for following through.

John Mackey and Zach Ware.

5 p.m. The free lecture, part of the Downtown Speaker Series, begins in downtown Vegas. I came by myself so I would be forced to interact with other people. Every attendee gets the guest speaker's brand-new hardcover book. I am a sucker for free books. John Mackey, the co-founder of Whole Foods markets, chatted with Zach Ware, a Zappos executive who is the host of the speaker series. The conversation is candid and funny, and I had submitted a question to the speaker (via e-mail) that wasn't asked. During the lecture, I take a few pictures and tweet about this great event. After all, I am a self-appointed downtown cheerleader.

The adorable Park on Fremont.

6:15 p.m. A dear friend and client comes to pick me up at the event and we go to dinner at an adorable new restaurant, Park on Fremont. Even though the day has been unseasonably cold, we sit outside next to an open fireplace. We run into Tony Hsieh again, who's giving John Mackey the tour of downtown, and he appears to remember me now.

8 p.m. We move to The Beat coffee house for a cup of coffee. My friend/client asks me for some advice, and I try to give solid advice using some of the skills I learned in Monday's Downtown Speaker Series lecture about making decisions, which is definitely not my forte. My suggestions seem to be helpful.

9 p.m. Back home. Hubby is back from a shopping spree for our backyard remodel with our contractor and neighbor, who's doing the work. We heat up some tasty leftover meatloaf, asparagus and potatoes for him, as he has not eaten, and we sit and chat.

9:30 p.m. Since I did not do as much work during the day as I had wanted, I have no choice but to work a few hours now. I deliver two more projects and proof another translation that Dagy had sent me. She signs on to her computer at 10 p.m. my time, which is 7 a.m. in Vienna. Yes, she is an early bird. We discuss the details of a few projects and I tell her about my evening. I start the translation I accepted earlier today.

10 p.m. I grade a few submissions from my students and decide to do 30 more minutes of copywriting: a project about the state of Montana, which is due tomorrow. I end up doing an hour, and then I'm too tired to work on my simultaneous interpreting exercises for the federal court interpreter examination. I also didn't have the chance to look for hotels in Monterey, where I am going next month to take a week-long course at the Monterey Institute of International Studies. I briefly look for flights to Brazil for August (I am giving one of the keynotes at the Proz conference in Recife), but can't decide on connections. I am notoriously indecisive with big purchases, and I don't book the flight (for now). I also try to empty my inbox, but I fail, as usual. I am, however, down to 66 e-mails. I tell myself there's always tomorrow to get things done.

11 p.m. I get hubby off the couch and upstairs and finish the evening by reading a half hour or so. I am currently devouring Isabel Allende's latest novel (Maya's Notebook) in the original Spanish version. The reviews were terrible, but I am enjoying it.

Interpreting Blunder of the Month

We are quite fond of highlighting our own mistakes to share them with our readers, so here we go. Read on for Judy's most recent not-so-great interpreting blunder.

A few months ago, I was interpreting for a Spanish-speaking witness at a relatively routine deposition for a civil litigation matter. I've done hundreds of these, but they are always exciting, challenging  and potentially contentious. There's nothing like being in the middle of five lawyers barking at each other, but alas, this particular assignment was very civil on every level.

Without divulging any details about the case (all identifying details have been changed), the deponent was testifying about a trip to a supermarket. The deposing attorney asked her about which articles she had purchased. Here's what happened.

Deponent (Spanish): Bueno, compré calabacín, zanahorias, papaya, plátanos y romero.
Judy (interpreting into English): Well, I bought zucchini, carrots, papaya, bananas and..... um, excuse me, the interpreter is drawing a blank. Allow me to briefly come up with this term. (5 endless seconds pass). Um, I am very sorry, ladies and gentlemen, but may the interpreter look up this term in an upcoming break and then supply the correct term for the record?
Opposing counsel, smiling: If the interpreter will allow it, I think I know the term. 
Judy (happy): Certainly, counsel, thank you.
Opposing counsel: It's rosemary. I believe the word you are looking for is rosemary. 
Judy: Yes, of course. Thank you, counsel. Counsel, would you please repeat the question for the deponent so we can get her full answer this time? Apologies for the confusion. The interpreter will be buying lunch.
Deposing counsel: No problem. I am craving lamb chops with rosemary.

An hour later, the deposing counsel called the firm that had hired me for this deposition and requested that he not work with anyone else but.... me. I was afraid he'd call and say the opposite, but my fears were unfounded. Turns out he was impressed with my performance, blunder and all, and it's reassuring that no one expects perfection 100% of the time: it's how you recover from potential errors that matters. I have done many depositions at this particular firm since then, and a few weeks ago, I saw opposing counsel in the elevator. He said hello, and then he said he might consider calling me Rosemary so I wouldn't forget (I won't anyway). We both laughed all the way to the top floor.

Would you care to share (that rhymes!) one of your interpreting blunders, dear readers?

Bad Habits, Part II

Junia, the American-born cat. She now resides in Vienna.

As promised, we are back with Dagy's bad habits. Many of you have identified with Judy's bad work habits, and it was lovely to hear from so many of you. Read on for Dagy's challenges.

Getting side-tracked by low-hanging fruit.  Instead of wrecking my brain about the translation of a particularly tricky sentence, I will sometimes drift off to take care of low-hanging fruit, like answering a quick e-mail or reading my Twitter stream. It's easier and also more fun.

Having too many browser tabs open. This bad habit of having countless tabs open on my browser used to slow down my previous laptop. My brand-new computer can handle it just fine, at least for now. Our techie is a strong advocate of having just a few browser tabs open. I have certainly tried, but I have not had much success. I'll keep on trying.

Excessive multitasking. I am known for having my internet radio on a French station, trying to listen to the German livestream of an interpretation of an EU session on my computer while trying to get actual work done. The obvious result: I don’t remember a thing about what I heard on the radio or the livestream and the translation takes forever. Not a very good strategy, is it?

Reading my favorite newspaper  (the German weekly “ZEIT”) on Thursday afternoons. Add my Thursday morning Yoga class and that doesn’t leave a lot of time for paid work. J

Letting the cat, Junia, hang out on the desk, which means that I am constantly picking cat hair out of my keyboard. I try to accomplish this by using my beloved Chilean letter opener with the cute penguin on the handle. I am a bit obsessed with having a squeaky clean keyboard, but I have no illusions about actually reaching that goal.

Dear colleagues: what about you? Care to share your bad habits? We'd love to hear about them. 

Cringe-Inducing Translation Errors (Spanish/English)

As seen in Las Vegas. Photo by Judy Jenner. 

It's time to laugh, dear colleagues! Well, or cry, or cringe, or be mortified. Have a look at these hilarious Spanish-English translation errors, mainly found on signs in public spaces, courtesy of the Huffington Post. We've been taking pictures of bad translations ourselves for years, sometimes risking our personal safety to do so  (turns out that some business owners don't appreciate this!) , and it's great that Huff Post is spreading the word, too. Perhaps the general public will start thinking more about the importance of professional translators.

We find it particularly cringe-inducing that big companies such as Starbucks have been photographed "in the act" of abusing the poor, poor Spanish language. Have a look at the Huffington Post slideshow here.

Bad Habits

It's time to confess that, not surprisingly, we have plenty of bad habits. Some of them are translation-related while others have to do with business practices. We would love to hear yours, but we figured Judy would start out with a list of her bad habits:

• Eating at my desk. I know it's good for you to sit at an actual table, enjoy a meal and not multi-task while eating. However, for one reason or another, I frequently find myself at my desk, wolfing down my miso soup or organic kale salad while trying to prevent getting food on my keyboard. This is not a very relaxing way to spend my lunch break, and I shall improve on this.
• Shiny object syndrome. While I am quite proficient at working at several projects and assignments at the same time, I do have to admit that I frequently stop what I am doing to turn my attention to new and perhaps more interesting (if not more pressing) things. I've tried to not check my e-mail every five minutes, but that does not to seem to work very well. Going after shiny objects is definitely a bad habit.
• Not getting up from my desk frequently enough. While I try to do some sort of physical activity every day (Bikram yoga, running, tennis, stretching, weight lifting), I do have a tendency to get very highly focused on some projects and tend to forget time. My unofficial goal is to get up once an hour to do sit-ups and triceps dips, but I must admit that doesn't happen that often. I must improve on this.

Next time we will bring you a list of Dagy's bad habits. In the meantime: what are your bad habits? Please share them by leaving a comment!